His dead Wife’s Picture is found on the Fireplace. Should I Ask Him to eliminate it?

Reader Question:

I was solitary chat room for cheaters a long time! I’m prepared to have a relationship again, and that I’m not getting more youthful! You will find came across an excellent guy. The two of us were widowed for longer than six many years. I placed my photographs away although not my personal recollections.

I’m concerned because he’s his partner’s picture hanging across fireplace, and he requested me to believe that it will not be removed. I’m sure he enjoyed the lady, and I could not ask him to reject it.

I don’t feel comfortable. I do believe i’ll feel just like I’m the third person. I don’t know how to feel about it. May I get some good advice here?

–Alondra H. (Montana)

Dr. Wendy Walsh’s Answer:

This actually is a fine question and another that I get many. I would like you to definitely reframe your thought of this photograph. The lady over the fireplace is not his lifestyle, inhaling girlfriend. She’s a symbol of the enjoying attachment this guy can develop.

The guy takes his responsibilities extremely seriously. This is a good thing! He may even be concerned about the thoughts of mature young ones which might notice missing out on image because their mother getting replaced.

When I was a development reporter, used to do a profile on a retired Air Force colonel that has produced the hop to Internet business owner. Their girlfriend managed our very own television crew at their house as soon as I asked if she could provide us with an on-camera “soundbyte” about his home existence, she really gracefully declined by describing that they were newlyweds so there was an other woman that has stood behind that man for 28 many years before she passed away of breast cancer.  This made the colonel offer this lady a huge hug and demand that she seem with him on digital camera.

My advice to you: do not check their late spouse as a possibility. See the girl as an ally. Getting rid of an image won’t eliminate their memories, it might drive a wedge in a budding union with a commitment-oriented man.

No counseling or therapy guidance: the website cannot offer psychotherapy information. Your website is supposed mainly for usage by customers searching for basic information of interest related to issues individuals may face as individuals plus in interactions and relevant subject areas. Material is certainly not meant to replace or serve as substitute for professional assessment or solution. Contained observations and views shouldn’t be misunderstood as certain counseling information.